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(c) Sven Bannuscher
UK News

Vicky Beeching: I don't feel comfortable in evangelical churches

"I just haven't felt comfortable in them," she said in an Buzzfeed interview to mark 12 months since announcing she was a lesbian.

"I now feel I wear a label that I hadn't worn before. I would be welcome to attend any evangelical church - as anybody would - but it's unlikely I would be allowed to do any of the things I used to do, whether it be speaking, preaching, or singing up front.

"Things suddenly feel very difficult and painful because you're welcome to a certain level but not beyond. There's an invisible glass ceiling in churches for many LGBT Christians."

The 36-year-old revealed last year she struggled with her sexuality for her whole life and first noticed her attraction to other girls at the age of 12.

YouTube
Vicky Beeching now co-presents some items on BBC's Sunday Morning Live

She said there was a church she started attending but had to stop when "stalker-ish people" arrived asking church workers for her personal details.

Vicky, who now commentates on TV and radio, said she now attends cathedrals to avoid the contemporary worship music she wrote and performed for years.

Hearing it "just evokes so much of a life I've lost", she said.

She said coming out meant bookings for her to appear and perform had almost totally disappeared: "My American music team - booking or recording - said I'm basically un-bookable now because the tours would be in megachurches and big Christian festivals and none of them would be accepting of an out gay person."

"People are aware I have influence within the church so they say things like, 'You've got the blood of a generation on your hands' and various crazy things about [me] working with the devil, and hoping I'll be hurt, injured, disabled; people saying it would be right for me to be taken out."

In the interview she again called for the Church to rethink its approach to gay people.

Worship Leader Vicky Beeching

"People rethought ideology around slavery - William Wilberforce was fighting for abolition and many Christians were quoting the Bible, saying, 'The Bible clearly says slavery's OK.' And today we're in the same position. I would urge pastors and priests to re-examine the texts. We need a new enlightenment around this topic."

She has also revealed she's been diagnosed with M.E., also called chronic fatigue syndrome (CFS).

"It's been a journey of constantly wrestling with energy," she said, "I can't do as much as an average person. I have to know what's coming up in my week to conserve energy, so if I'm doing a day of TV filming I need to rest the day before."

She added: "I can still perform at my best, but just in concentrated bursts, so people think I'm very fit and healthy only seeing me popping up on TV or the radio, but it's actually been quite different in my private life. I have to say no to a lot of things."

"There is a certain grieving over my wellbeing, because I can't help feeling like it's all related to having had to walk such a difficult path - living in the closet cost me more than I ever imagined it would."

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